What HEA Means to Me
Several years ago I began looking for information about hypospadias, sure I knew what it was but I wanted to understand the nuts and bolts of the condition. When I was little going thru all my operations I hadn’t been told much and never asked questions, so I wanted to know more.
My search led me to a Yahoo HS group that I stayed with for a bit but soon left because of spam on the message board and such. Then a few years ago I found HEA, it looked well put together and offered serious information. I posted on the message board and, before long I had made friends with Chris Arnold and several others. For the first time I could explain what I went through without being embarrassed and to my shock there were others who understood and had similar stories to tell. War stories were shared, experiences told and tips given. I posted a lot in the beginning, just wanting to share myself and maybe, just maybe, be of help to others.
A conference was coming up in New York. I wanted to go but, due to one excuse after another, I backed out. I really don’t think I was ready yet. And then came Norfolk. All my life I had been pretty much silent on my condition, only telling my very best friend and hating it when my mother shared it with others. Growing up I had been shy and kept to myself but here I was sharing my very personal story with complete strangers who let me know that it was okay and they understood. I met a lot of great, caring people who I now call friends and feel comfortable doing so.
In August we have another conference which I look forward to going to. I think I have started coming out of the shell I had built around myself, I’m not quite where I want to be but, I am getting there. I think that is part of what HEA can offer someone, a place where at your own pace you can give of yourself, be accepted, feel better and maybe, just maybe, find peace. When one does that then maybe they can lend a hand to others looking for a light out of the darkness.
That is what HEA means to me.