Severe Epispadias

Now that I have read the other stories posted here, it is apparent that my experiences are not completely different from those I have read. It was a bit surprising (well, not really) that no one else seems to have suffered from or grown up as a youth with “severe epispadias.” I was also surprised to see that what seemed to be a large number of gay men writing the stories, and, as one mentioned, there would certainly seem to be a strong case for homosexuality and these two types of birth defects. Any doctors looking for a new book topic?

Growing up for me was more difficult than for most, I believe. Six surgeries that transpired from when I was a newborn to when I was a teenager. A seventh was to be in the works, but frankly my trust for doctors as a whole and my own parents made it virtually impossible for me to go under the knife again. And since this surgery was to be elective, well, let’s just say it never happened.

From the normal wetting problems as a young boy to the ever growing concerns of never seeming to be the same as the other boys (and then young men), there have been self-consciousness issues with me throughout my life. By the time I was in high school and the standard boys’ locker room requirements with physical education classes, it’s no wonder the other boys thought (or knew) I was gay before I did. After all, how could I not stare at them when they were so different from me?

Needless to say, adulthood has not improved much. There have certainly been one or two men that had their special place, but for the most part I tend to find myself alone. If anyone out there thinks that boys can be cruel, they have no idea how cruel other men can be. I would have to presume that if I were heterosexual, the same would be said for the women. I mean after all, it’s all about size no matter what the sex…isn’t it!

Not having read a story posted here from anyone who seemed to have a similar condition, I can honestly say that the emotional and psychological scars are as difficult as or possibly more difficult to deal with throughout life than the physical ones. Anyone who thinks differently does not know what they are talking about, nor do they have the experience to know any better.

But for now, thanks for letting me post my story. Perhaps this will have a positive result or at least stem another story or two. So for now, my best to those who took the time to read what I had to say.

Christopher